22 October, 2012

A writing exercise?

Some of my friends who completed this BlogThings post had disclaimers at the beginning of their stories. I am fairly nervous about what I have composed, so I feel motivated to do the same.

As I mentioned last week, this week's prompt is to choose a song and write a short piece of fiction inspired by it. My added challenge is to focus everything within the context of this blog—my chinadventures.

Chinese literature has been in the news lately, so I thought I would attempt some of my own. Then I realised I'm not a great writer; instead I started developing ideas about China-themed writing. At the same time, my iTunes library blessed me with some inspiration.

I wanted to use this song, as well as conversations I had with my students, to inspire my writing. The goal is capture some of the emotions and feelings my students have toward life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. I hope you enjoy it.

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Dear diary,

I lack the words to say my feelings, but my teacher wants me to try. He is kind and tells me it will help my English. I want to make my English better, but writing is hard. I worry about the grammar.

I was told to write about anything I want. I know what I want. But I don’t think I can have it. What a pity is my situation. Allow me explain… I am a shy girl. I am not beautiful. But I have good fortune, I am attending university. I made my family very proud when I got accepted to university. I worked hard to please them.

Growing up in primary school, I rarely seen my parents. They moved to the city many hours to the south. They must work so I can go to school. During this time, I lived with my grand father and I saw my parents only on holidays. Also then, my grand mother died. My grandfather had great hardship caring for me while grieving.

My mother used to tell me I was unique and could grow up to be whatever I want to be. Frankly speaking, this I know is not true. I cannot be not Chinese. It is not because I do not love China, it is because I feel trapped. This feeling began in high school.

As we all know, the Gaokao is the most important test for Chinese, and you must score well to advance in the society. It was at this time that I begin to feel the gap between the rich and the poor. My classmates could use the Internet to help them prepare and I could not. I felt a great disadvantage. My family encouraged me, they want me to not live a poor life.

Now, I am a college student. My parents are still working in the city without a set of room that belongs to them. They tell me they will return to the country when I graduate from university. That will be soon, but what can I do? I dream of travel. I want to broaden my horizons and see many beautiful things, but I can not leave my family. They say it is not proper for a girl to travel by herself. They tell me if I find a husband, I can travel with him.

I do not want a husband, at least not now. I want to live more life and gain more colourful experiences. I must continue postgraduate study, but it is hard. The education system is problematic and many students are too lazy.

I do not want to sound too negative. China is my country, there are just many problems in many aspects. I want to change the country, the same as many college student. However, it seems as soon as the young entered the society, they lost their dreams and ambition. It is a kind of contamination. 

Next week: Pick something new to do this week—something you have never attempted before—and write a how-to about this new thing.

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